WE DID IT....

Yes...I have found Mr. T's biological dad. I'd like to say it was my 'psychic abilities' or 'sheer genius' but I'd be lying to you. It was plain old work and perseverance...that's all it was...and maybe a little luck thrown in. If I learned anything from this experience is 'never say never' ...no matter who you are and no matter where you live...if somebody wants to find you they will.

Now my son is calling me 'the dawg'! You can run...but you can't hide! So back off 'Dog the Bounty Hunter' eat your heart out!

It wasn't too hard! I entered the name 'Francois' in Canada 411...and got a list of names to start with.... looking in the area of Winnipeg, Nelson House and Norway House and all the Indian reservations. With each number I called...I hoped to get in touch with a cousin or an Aunt or Uncle that would be related somehow......and that's exactly what happened. I happened to call a cousin of his....at first she was hesitant...not knowing if I was a bill collector or looking for child support. When I explained the situation...that we were hoping to find a bone marrow match...she went out of her way to help me. She told me to look at Norway House which is an Indian Reservation outside of Winnipeg. She went as far as to tell me...that Fred's mother was living there on the reserve...but she didn't have a phone. From that information alone..I sent a letter to the band police via email....and a few days after I got a call from a lady officer telling me that Yes....the lady did live there...and Eureka!! so did her son, Fred Francois. This lady officer made sure to deliver my letter to the mother of Fred and the same day...late at night...Fred called me!

He called me at 12:30 at night...I was so thrilled and excited. Finally...I was talking to Mr. T's biological dad. He was more than anxious to help out in any way he could. Even though it would mean an 8 hr drive to Winnipeg, (the closest big city) to get tested.... he was more than happy to do so.

I found out a bit of his medical history....he is 40 and suffers from diabetes and epilepsy...which is good to know. I told him that the Oncology Team would be in touch and they would have him tested at the closest hospital to see if he would be a good bone marrow match.

I was so excited I couldn't go back to sleep for hours. This is a win/win situation! If he is a bone marrow match....great...and if not...he can help me get Mr. T an Indian card which will help with all his dental and medical bills.

Fred told me to his knowledge he has 9 kids in all! From the age of 8 to 22. The head nurse was thrilled when she found out...but I told her Fred doesn't have custody of any of these kids...so it's not up to him to decide if they are to be tested or not. I know that the nurse was thinking...the more, the merrier. It does happen that sometimes both parents aren't a match ..that's why they will test other children from the parents....and if not...then they have to go to the worldwide bone marrow registry to find a match...but still.... there is a chance that he just might be 'the' perfect match. Wouldn't that be great?

Everything happens for a reason...I don't believe in coincidences! Hopefully one day Mr. T. can meet his biological dad and perhaps find out about his ancestors and meet his other siblings...and know his roots. We all have a need to know where we come from...in order to know where we're headed. I have spoken to Mr. T about his roots...and he is curious...so hopefully one day when Mr. T is ready....he can meet his father and learn about his roots and culture. I will let you know what happens.....just stay tuned!

For those of you that are looking for a loved one or family member or friend...I say...Never Give Up.....follow your heart...and follow the clue's. Nobody can go through life without leaving clues like breadcrumbs behind them. Start with what you know...and go from there. Where there's a will....there's a way. You'll find it.

NOW WE KNOW....

what the diagnosis is.... Mr. T has been diagnosed with 'Mylodysplastic Syndrome'. In plain english it means 'sick bone marrow'. October 2nd was a very long day. First there was blood work....then Mr. T. had his bone marrow aspiration. They tried to give him a lumbar puncture but he had problems breathing so the anesthesiologist had the doctor stop. The results of the bone marrow aspiration was the same as previous weeks results. They can see cancer cells but they haven't moved much....they go from 3% to 6% and back down again...which tells them that he has a sick bone marrow. The Oncology team told us that the only way to correct this is to have a bone marrow transplant....so that is the plan. They have sent all the results to a crytogenetics lab...and regardless of the lab results...they will go ahead with a bone marrow transplant. We await the results...as this will tell the Team what program to follow....In 2 to 3 weeks they will call us in for a meeting....and start the plan in action.

We know that we will stay at the hospital and they will try to get rid of the cancer cells...then we will be transferred to Toronto Sick Kids for the bone marrow transplant. They told us to expect to be away from home for several months...2 to 3 months depending on his health.

Late in the day he had 2 more cups of blood removed.....they are still trying to remove iron from his liver....which made him sick and dizzy but thankfully....Mr. T's appetite is quite good!

Mr. T is anxious to get the show on the road. He wants the bone marrow transplant. He is tired of appointments, missing school, blood work, bone marrow tests and just wants to be a normal kid.

I don't blame him at all....he knows that his bone marrow is not normal.....and he believes with a new bone marrow he can lead a normal life.....a life without cancer, needles and chemo.

I'm glad that Mr. T and I get to spend 2 or 3 more weeks at home..to prepare ourselves mentally and emotionally for the ordeal ahead.

Thank you for all the prayers and good wishes you have sent our way. We are so happy to have the support and encouragement from all the wonderful bloggers that will be with us on our journey to good health. Together we can make it happen!

WHERE'S MY DADDY?

We know 'who' Mr. T's daddy is...but 'where' is he? That's the question. 13 years ago...a young lady of 15 met a 27 year old gent...and a child was born. 'Mr. T'. When this man heard the young woman was pregnant.....he left...he was concerned about his age and her age. He knew she was pregnant...but he doesn't know he has a son. When Mr. T. was 6 months old...my son met this young lady...fell in love...(I became an instant grandma) and 2 years later they had a daughter. I now have 2 grandkids.

When Mr. T. was first diagnosed with Leukemia...his birth mother was tested to see if she could possibly be a bone marrow donor (if needed) ...and so was his half-brother and half-sister...but unfortunately they didn't match.

A month ago...the Oncology Team asked me if it was possible to find the biological father?? I asked them if it was absolutely necessary?? I'm a firm believer in the adage..'if it's not broke...don't fix it'....and the team told me that yes...it was a good idea to pursue it. They told me that the 'father' may not be a match...but then again he just 'might' be...and it was worthwhile to find him. We also know that he has 2 other daughters that are older than Mr. T. somewhere in Canada....and they as well just might be a donor match. So the hunt is on!

Oh and also....even if the biological father is not a match....we can ask him to sign a form stating that he is the biological father....and this will give Mr. T. the rights to get an Indian Card.
My son...the adopted father...has no medical insurance or drug plan. This Indian card would benefit Mr. T. in so many ways.

Because Mr. T received 6 months of aggressive chemo...his teeth suffered. (Chemo dries out the mouth, bacteria thrives and causes havoc on teeth). He needs $1400 of dental surgery right now...and more in the future. This is just for 6 tiny cavities not seen by the eye. Also., some of the cancer drugs are not fully covered by his health card. From what I understand...an Indian card would help with the dental work...chemo medication...transportation to and from apts...rental of any medical equipment he may need now or in the future & tutors if needed while in the hospital.

As you can see...it has not been a smooth journey for my Young Warrior! I believe he should have his Indian Card...it's his right and his heritage. Mr. T's mother is Caucasion and his father is Cree. The oncology team has told me that it is more difficult to find a bone marrow donor if you are of mixed heritage. Your chances are much better if both of your parents are caucasian.

Perhaps someone out there can help me find his father?? or tell me how to go about it??

His father's name is FRED FRANCOIS...he is a Cree Indian and approximately 40 years old. When Mr. T's mother met him 13 years ago...he was working as a 'carny' in the fair..travelling all over Canada and the States..but mainly in Canada. He did move around a lot...so I don't think he does the same work..most probably he's a laborer. Mr. T's mother tells me that Fred Francois just moved around from place to place and worked in labor or construction. She believes that his family came from western Canada...possibly Edmonton, Saskatchewan, Manitoba...etc. And that when she knew him he had 2 daughters (from different women) ...who would now be 18 or 20...so possibly he has more children now.


It is possible that we're looking for a 'needle in a haystack'...but I believe in miracle's. If you have any idea's or suggestions on how I can find his father...please let me know..I welcome any thoughts you may have.
I have entered the name 'Francois' in Canada 411...for different provinces...and I have quite a list of names. I am calling each person hoping that maybe they are somehow related and know how to get in touch with this man. I do have a telephone plan...600 minutes for $26...so I am making good use of it. Any idea's??

ANTICIPATION!

So far...so good! Mr. T's apt on Sept 18th went as well as it should. Once again they took blood from him...this time 2 cups. We also had blood work done. We saw the head of the oncology team...and she 'anticipates' (what a horrible word) that on our next apt...Oct. 2nd..that we will stay at the hospital. Once again she warned us...'come prepared to stay awhile'...but then again it depends.

I asked her "is it possible that the number can stay the same for a long time?" and she said. "No."

I asked her if it was possible that the numbers would go back to zero??? maybe? miraculously? and she said..."No."

Well...doctor's may not believe in miracle's...but I do! You never know. You can't believe everything you hear.

Looking at the blood work and the numbers...she 'anticipates' that the cancer cells will have spread by his next apt. Mr. T. will have a bone marrow aspiration done that morning, more blood work...and that will tell us how many cancer cells are in his bone marrow. If the number is 20 and up....we stay...if not we can go home and wait. Right now his platelet count is at 58....under 25 they will give him platelets and blood. The normal range is between 150-450.

Mr. T does have a bad cold...but they listened to his lungs...and they don't seem to be worried about it. Otherwise.... he has been going to school....football games...after-school activities, biking and eating me out of house and home. There are many things I'm thankful for. I'm thankful that we do have these 2 weeks at home. I believe that if God is willing....anything is possible.

Football Season!

Mr. T is on the Football Team. Although he is not allowed any contact sports because of his port-a-cath, he was given several jobs. He is Mascot, Water boy, and Equipment Manager. He is thrilled! And he gets to go on all the trips with the team! Nothing like a Title to make you feel better.



And I get to pick him up when they have a game, and dish out money for meals.



Mr. T. gave me a title...Mascot maid!

ANOTHER BMA!

This morning we had another Bone marrow aspiration. This test is done to see if the cancer cells have grown. I have mentionned that Mr. T's cancer blasts were at 10. When they are at 20..he will start the chemotherapy. So far, the Oncology team are very happy that the blasts haven't spread yet. Their main concern is to get the iron out of his blood. Once he starts chemo...the iron will increase....not decrease...so its' imperitive to lose the iron now!

Well... good news! The results of the BMA were good! The blasts haven't changed....they are still at 10....which means there is no movement in the blasts. So...cancer cells haven't spread yet...but they do anticipate that they will. They tell me that this is a 'good thing'. . ..While they remain inactive...this gives the team a chance to get rid of the excess iron in Mr. T.'s blood. And they are trying hard with the chelation therapy and the 'removing of the blood' therapy. With each day comes a new challenge.

The Oncology Team thinks this is great! They need the time to get rid of the iron. They know that as soon as chemo starts and they have to give Mr. T. blood transfusions.....well, the iron will accumulate once again...and this can prove to be dangerous for him. They (the team) hope that it continues like this....they want to be able to continue to remove the excess iron without having to start chemo...and so far....so good!

And so we can go home till the 18th!!!! Yahoo! Mr. T. can go to school and get home-care till we come back for further tests. The Team call Mr. T. an 'enigma' (something puzzling, mysterious or inexplicable) but I can explain it. The reason Mr. T's cells haven't budged is because of all the people out there praying for him...and his Magic Afghan that is full of love and prayer. The doctors don't seem to care for my explanation but then again, they have been wrong in the past.

As long as Mr. T's cells don't spread...he can lead a normal life. Well he isn't allowed any contact sports because of his port-a-cath, but he can do gym...and we do have to watch for bleeding or bruising. The Oncology Team tells us that once the cells are there....they do anticipate that they will grow. That's the word they use...'anticipate'.....what they mean is....it will happen....but till then we can enjoy some semblance of a normal life! So excuse me while I go pack! And don't stop praying!

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

The menu can get to be monotonous if it is the same thing every day! All kids at the Children's Hospital eat for FREE...as long as they are admitted to the hospital. You can order breakfast, lunch and dinner and snacks till 7 p.m. every day. The menu never changes. The portions remain the same. All pasta comes from a can....and the same with soups. As you can see when looking at the menu...its not really healthy! They serve kids french fries, poutine's...and cheeseburgers or chicken fingers...everything is breaded. The only thing that is healthy are the fruits they offer or the small salads and juice.

Everything can get tiresome after awhile. The main goal of the hospital is to get kids to eat no matter what. When undergoing chemo...a child will lose their appetite....and the best way to encourage them to eat is to let them have hotdogs, cheeseburgers, pizza, chicken fingers, etc.

But Mr. T. is used to home cooking. He loves home-made soup, lasagna, chicken & mashed potato's, shepherd's pie and beef stew! And he loves fettucine alfredo! There is a Mr. Sub at the hospital...it serves submarine sandwiches and pizza 7 days a week till 11 p.m. They get their pizza from Pizza Pizza and their subs are inferior to Subway's but better than the children's menu. The hospital also has a cafeteria that is only open 5 days a week from 8 a.m. till 6 p.m...and every day they offer a salad bar....a main dish...(lasagna, spaghetti, chinese, stirfry, home-made soup, etc) and a dessert bar! So, of course Mr. T. prefers the cafeteria....and shuns the children's menu!

Mr. T. and I are not in agreement! I told him if he eats his breakfast and lunch on the kid's menu...I will buy his dinner! I will not budge! Mr. T. is very convincing...and headstrong..but so am I! "No can do"...said I!

Mr. T argued that he would 'die' eating hospital food (he says they getter better food in jail) little does he know 'he's right'....so far this morning he had 2 bagels with cream cheese and chocolate milk and for lunch he had (canned soup) yech! and grilled cheese, pudding and milk....and he is still breathing!!

If you click on the menu...you can see what's available!